I've been gone from the blogsphere for sometime but I had to get my mind right. I'm still not quite all there, but whoever created the mantra to take one day @ a time knew that it wasn't just for the Anonymous. This is an open letter to Fannie C. Womble, my best friend, my # 1 supporter, and my horse for all the races she won:
Mommy, it's been 2 months and often it seems like 2 days. On this Father's Day I'm missing my dad as I do every year, but the aching for you is just as deep. I can hear your laugh and I thank you for the gift of humor and making a joke out of all of life's adversities. Thank you for keeping shit so so real with me. Whatever I asked, you never tried to hide the truth. And towards the end, I truly could see all of your ways in myself. Sometimes we used to disagree because I couldn't accept it, but I got the best of the best and can hear you telling me how much you prayed for me to begin life inside of your womb. But no, you were my gift & I THANK GOD for you, for having 28 wonderful years of an unconditional love that so many people never get the chance to experience. Mommy, I am who I am because of you. God is the greatest and what they say is true, a mother is the closest to the One above. I Love You is simply not enough and I will carry on your life & love always. Momma, I Made It!

MY BOTTOM BITCH

"The Latest, Greatest Murda Mami"

oh yea, she's killin' em 1-by-1 & I love love love that niggas don't know who the fluck she is. Keep these hoes guessin MissAmber!

G20 "GET MONEY" SUMMIT

"GIVE ME CONTROL OF A NATION'S MONEY SUPPLY, AND I CARE NOT WHO MAKES ITS LAWS"

Oh G-Money definitely knows sumthin'! I've been on the low as of lately just tryna sit back and examine this whole financial crisis and make sense of it all. Seriously, I can't even begin to see through the bullshit because it's that thick. Everyday the media feeds us bad news on top of shitty news and while I love the current protests going on in London and around the world, it really doesn't matter. What's really good behind the closed doors where the Group of Twenty Finance Ministers and Central Bank Governors meet? Are people truly convinced that these talks in some way will benefit their state of well-being? I have no answers just hundreds of questions. Aside from Slumdog Millionaire, Zeitgeist is probably the best thing that I had the pleasure of viewing this past year. Follow the drip and your mouth will remain :0

JILLY FROM PHILLY IS TRULY NO. 1

Once you get past the natural reaction to kiikii @ JillScott's (4.04) Afrikan accent, the landscape for the No.1 Ladies becomes this breathtaking backdrop for a promising tv series. Mama Africa never looked so beautiful and Jill & Anika Rose along with the awesome cast make her proud. There exists all of the right elements of surprise, mystery, rich history and humor. There is something familiar with this role, which I firmly believe wasn't much of a stretch for the loving, bosom-hugging Jilly. Give it try if you haven't done so. I put my $$$ on this one!

CUNTASTICAL

So we kick off March Madness and Women's Month with "Cuntastical" featuring my homie, my ace, the forever childlike Drew Barrymore (2.22). Already a fan of Firestarter, her bestseller "Little Girl Lost" was like the first bio I completed. At age 9 I instantly became a magnet to anything Drew. When we got our first VCR, I rented Poison Ivy so many times the dude who owned the dusty movie rental spot at the corner of Liberty Heights & Gwynn Oak had it waiting for me behind the counter. Aside from a family background in cinematic drama, Drew brings it. As of lately her m.o. has been delightfully fun chickie flics which I lovelovelove, but I've missed the dark side. Next month she takes on the role of Little Edie in the HBO remake of Grey Gardens {follow the drip}. It tells the story of Jackie Onassis' reclusive auntie and cousin who live in a decaying 28-room mansion in East Hampton. The original 1975 doc is jarring as the two women share a delusional world and a room with cats who shit and piss in the corner, oblivious to the garbage that fills the rest of their space. A recent W article reads that Drew never broke character, off the set or during the entire shooting so I'm certain she will hole in one. Major props to her production company Flower Films whose 7 flics have generated 900 mil. Yep, the girl has the formula and forever a place in that soft spot of my journey to womanhood.

THE NAKED & THE NUDE

The Naked and the Nude
Robert Graves

For me, the naked and the nude
(By lexicographers construed
As synonyms that should express
The same deficiency of dress
Or shelter) stand as wide apart
As love from lies, or truth from art.

Lovers without reproach will gaze
On bodies naked and ablaze;
The Hippocratic eye will see
In nakedness, anatomy;
And naked shines the Goddess when
She mounts her lion among men.

The nude are bold, the nude are sly
To hold each treasonable eye.
While draping by a showman's trick
Their dishabille in rhetoric,
They grin a mock-religious grin
Of scorn at those of naked skin.

The naked, therefore, who compete
Against the nude may know defeat;
Yet when they both together tread
The briary pastures of the dead,
By Gorgons with long whips pursued,
How naked go the sometime nude!

Sidebar: I don't know why this came to mind, maybe my quest for passion, for heat, for the desire to do. I thought about my English teacher Mr. Rey and how much we both liked this poem, the way the words rolled off our tongues as well as its sexual seduction. Maybe you've heard of it, maybe this is the first time. Enjoy!

WHO ARE WE, REALLY?

Sooo, I got my Showtime back although I've missed out on the last 2 seasons of the L Word, my beloved Weeds and Californication. My new addiction is this united states of Tara chick. I haven't been this excited to tune in since The Wire. Watching Toni Collette and her enormous range of talent should make most of these networks ashamed to greenlight this bullshit we call television, especially when I had to wake up this afternoon to yet another Tyler Perry marathon. The shit just isn't funny anymore. But wait, was it ever? Now, Buck on the other hand {one of Tara's alters} is so funny it hurts. I can't help but see pieces of myself and I wonder if that yucky feeling I get in the pit of my stomach sometimes when I'm turned off by everyone including myself is just my way of transitioning. Does it ever happen to you? I think the most intriguing people suffer from DID, it makes coping with this thing called life a lot easier. Like Weeds, I look forward to hearing the theme song almost as much as the talent behind Diablo Cody's two-finger creation. Not because the plot is off-the-wall different, but because there are hundreds of layers that have yet to be explored. I hate that I can identify with Tara but still feel that pang of skepticism when she goes in & out of reality. Shit, don't we all wish we could...

WHEN I TELL 'EM ROLL UP!

Whether you twist up, favor the yak, pop or D. all of the above, please do it and watch this clip of Travis the Chimp. Fucked up that he went Hannibal on that lady, but this shit is hilare. This is still a wild, fuckin' monkey yo, so why all the disbelief? I haven't lmfao like this in a long time.

*Note: Xanax may decrease inhibitions, increase risk-taking behavior, rage and/or hostility.

A YEAR STRONGER

What exactly do birthdays teach us? I've always looked @ them as my personal New Year where I look back, remembering the times I thought I couldn't make it through this thing called life, understanding just how far a sense of humor can carry a sista. For me, a yearly ritual of reading the journal from the year before, laughing at all of the silent promises that I broke, tears and bath water that smeared my purple ink, tryna figure out where I want to go... They say that if you fail to plan, there really is nothing waiting for you around that corner. Well, I say planning never got me anywhere. As much as I have tried, my life takes its own route. Nevertheless, this gal right here has had major fun, met the most intriguing people and above it all I have loved hard. This year I brought my 28th in @ the 3-card poker table @ Harrah's Casino in the AC where the floor was packed with people gambling their worries, false happiness, drunkeness, and income tax returns away at tables whose limits were way high in honor of Cupid and President's day. If you've ever played 3-card you know how easy it is to fall for the game. When that straight flush comes your way and you're breaking even, the come up is orgasmic, instant gratification @ its best, and then "poof" the thrill is gone! Born on the Day of Inventiveness, I cant wait to see the many ways I'll reinvent MissWomble (2.15). Cheers to me and a round for the eccentric, chaotic crazies who share the same day:

Charles Tiffany, Founder of Tiffany & Co.
Galileo Galilei, Grandfather of Scientific Revolution
Griselda Blanco, Original Cocaine Cowgirl
Baby, Cash $ President
Matt Groening, Creator of The Simpsons
Susan B. Anthony, Women's Activist
John W. Nordstrom, Founder of duh!

Sidebar: Picture us @ the roundtable